Perfect Peace

A commodity, I do not doubt, that is only slightly more common than fields of amaranth on this side of the grave. But if anything comes close to it, it is the feeling you get when you realize that there is now no need to step from the shower into a blazer and shoes that were never meant to be walked in.

I learnt one thing from the process though: the number of howlers you think you can perpetrate in the space of an hour is nothing to the number you actually can perpetrate if you put your mind to it. And I don't mean the kind that involve not knowing how many yuan traded to the dollar when the markets opened last Monday. I mean the kind that resemble wearing an "I love Rasputin" badge to an interview for the position of personal bodyguard to Nicholas II.

"So, tell me why you think you're the best person for the job."

That's a question that ought to be easy to answer. Exaggeration is required, yes; you will sound narcissistic, possibly; but it shouldn't be difficult. Unless, of course, you are thoroughly disorientated, dead tired, unbelievably hungry, and you aren't really sure which company the interviewer represents and what position he is offering.

I pitched myself as a financial analyst to a marketing firm that was looking to hire me for an IT position. I think that sums it up to a nicety. There was the interviewer, clearly wondering why understanding finance should qualify me to work with a systems design team, and there was I, wondering if his complete lack of reaction boded good or ill.

Some of the bloopers - not all mine - were more memorable, though...

Interviewer: I was at IIMA myself.
Student: Really? So am I!

Student: I'm in Section C.
Interviewer: Oh, really? So was I.
Student: Did you win T-Nite?
Interviewer: No.
Student: We did.

Interviewer: So, is there anything you'd like to ask me?
Student: Do you have those T-shirts in the Large size?

Interviewer: You want to apply to position X?
Student: Yes.
Interviewer: But you've filled in the form for position Y.
Student: Oh.

It just can't happen at any other time.